My Hairy Luck

Recently we went for a drive by the house I grew up in. On the way back we stopped at a fast food place that we hadn’t been to in a while because it’s all the way across town. I wasn’t super hungry, but I definitely wanted to get a milkshake. I happily drank most of my milkshake on the way home. There was a little bit left and I decided to take the lid off of the cup so I could finish it. I pulled the lid off and there it was. A hair.
 
“You have got to be kidding me” I said to no one in particular.
 
“What?” my partner in crime said from the other room. He had just gone to throw his milkshake cup away. We keep the trash can in the laundry room so our son doesn’t try to knock it over.
 
“Guess what’s in my milkshake.”
 
He walked over and looked at the hair in my milkshake. He chuckled a little.
 
“You know what’s worse than finding a hair in your food? Finding half a hair.” he said.
 
“That’s not funny. That’s happened to me.”
 
“You have the worst luck with finding hair in food.”
 
“I know.”
 
I really do have the worst luck with finding hair in my food. Sitting there in the kitchen with my hairy milkshake I decided to make a list of all the food items I had found hair in over the past couple years.
 
Spinach Salad – This instance wasn’t so bad because it was sitting right on top of the salad when the waitress brought it to the table. I quickly asked for a salad that didn’t have hair in it.
 
Teriyaki Chicken – The hair was tightly wrapped around a piece of the chicken.
 
Potato Chowder – I had already eaten half the soup when the hair turned up in my spoon.
 
Turkey Sandwich – I noticed the hair poking out of one half of the sandwich. Unfortunately I had already eaten the other half.
 
Gingerbread Cookie – Luckily I’d flipped the cookie over and noticed the hair stuck in the dough before I took a bite.
 
Chicken Pot Pie – The hair had been baked in with the chicken filling.
 
I’m sure that some of you are thinking “What’s the big deal? Just pick it out. The rest is still alright.”
 
But I can’t do that.
 
“Why?” you might ask.
 
Pulled Pork.
 
Many years ago we had some leftover pulled pork in the fridge (I wasn’t the one that made it). I had enjoyed eating it the night before so I decided to warm up some leftovers for a sandwich. I bit into the sandwich and noticed a hair sticking out.
 
“Gross. There’s a hair in my sandwich.” I said to my partner in crime.
 
“Just pull it out. The rest is fine.”
 
So I pulled out the hair, and took another bite. I saw another hair. I spit out the bite I had just taken. I put the sandwich down and pulled off the top bun. There were multiple hairs in my sandwich. I wanted to throw up. Ever since then, whenever I find a hair in my food I stop eating.
 
I didn’t have pulled pork for a while after that. And I’m pretty sure I cringed when anyone mentioned pulled pork. Even now, when my partner in crime suggests it for dinner, he says “We should have some hair free pulled pork.”
 
It has also made me a little crazy about making sure that hair doesn’t end up in the food that I make. When I’m baking or cooking, I wear my hair in a ponytail and I usually wear an apron. The apron protects my clothes from food and also keeps any hair that might be on my clothes from getting into the food. (I have 2 long hair cats. There is always hair on my clothes.)
 
But even when you’re careful, sometimes stuff happens. And knowing my luck, if some of my hair did end up in food that I made, I’d be the one to find it.
When you find hair in your food, do you stop? Or do you keep eating?

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